Update

Well, I haven’t blogged in a few days, so I guess it’s time. The past few days have been a little rough, so I just didn’t feel like re-hashing. Today I’m feeling better and I know some of you are waiting to hear from me.

So, things at the crèche have been difficult. I won’t go into great detail as I know you’ve gotten the picture from previous posts. Just for a quick catch up…..Morgan hasn’t been attending this week as he is having some behavioral issues. Last week he was pinching and scratching everyone, including me all day. He even tried to bite me. Scary, considering he is HIV positive and has very poor oral health, sores in his mouth, etc. Good thing I was paying attention. At any rate, the Momma’s at the school didn’t want me to bring him back this week and I was trying to explain to them that it wasn’t my decision…I basically just pick the boys up on the way. There seems to be confusion as to who is responsible for what. Sibongile (the home the where the boys live) and Home From Home (the crèche) are the two organizations that have the agreement about the boys attending school there. CCS’s role in this is to provide transportation. And of course as volunteers for CCS, we help with the boys as well as all the other children here. As I stated in earlier posts, that wasn’t really happening. Sibongile made the decision to keep Morgan home for now, since he keeps acting out.

On a lighter note…Chumani is doing AWESOME! He has fit right in to his classroom. The children seem to have accepted him and the teachers seem to be on board for the most part. So that’s a great thing! Their attitude’s seem much better and I think they are able to see how smart he really is. In fact this morning when I was carrying him through the gate…I could barely walk! All the children were around me calling Chumani and talking to him in Xhosa. He was talking back to them and grinning from ear to ear. It was so awesome to see. I am very hopeful for Mr. Chumani! And very excited for him!

Back to the not so good part….I still am frustrated about the things I’ve mentioned before about the lack of training for the teachers and it seems no one knows or understands the agreement, the role of the volunteer, etc, etc, etc. Sibongile emailed Home From Home and CCS about this possible third child and what they expect from CCS and how they need an additional volunteer as the third little CP child will need “full time care.” I don’t agree with that nor does my director. If the little girl requires round the clock care, that needs to be done by a staff member of either organization, not the volunteer. Volunteers are on a three week cycle, the position isn’t sustainable. There will be no continuity for the little girl, nor would be skilled for her needs.

The manager of the crèche knows I have concerns as I’ve expressed them to her. She knows I’m not happy with how things have been handled with Morgan and Chumani and she knows that CCS has just called a meeting to get things ironed out. So needless to say the manager isn’t real pleased with me. I think she believes I just came in a started stirring the pot. She doesn’t feel there are any problems or issues with the boys at her crèche. Need I remind her that the 4 hours a day that they are there (when I’m there), she is usually not there, so she doesn’t see everything that goes on. But when she is there…she makes it very obvious that she doesn’t have anything to really say to me and I know some of the ladies are talking about me. The manager sees me as a threat, as she has basically been put on report.

Our director has called a meeting to try and resolve these issues. The meeting will include the crèche manager, the lady who founded Home from Home, I guess you would call her the CEO, a rep from Sibongile, the CCS Director, the CCS Program Manager and myself. It is scheduled for 0930 on Friday morning. Thankfully it’s my last day as I’m sure the people at Home From Home will be even less thrilled with me, since all the bosses will be there.

I’ve been really upset and feeling like this whole issue has really overshadowed my trip here. I was really feeling somewhat short changed. When I came back this time, I specifically requested the same placement. I specifically asked for Home From Home, so that I could have a similar experience as I did last time. I wanted to be able to spend time with all the children. I wanted to get to know them and know their stories. I wanted to be able to bond with them. I didn’t feel like I was able to do that. I wasn’t able to spend much time doing activities and crafts with the school children, as my days were consumed with just keeping up with Morgan and Chumani, since no one else wanted to deal with them. I felt cheated and frustrated and just really wished that my trip was over. Then I was talking to Teri. (She is one of the volunteers here that I have really bonded with. She and I will continue this friendship long after we both return home.) She reminded me of all that I have done for the boys and while my time here was stressful and frustrating, that perhaps what I did was more beneficial than anything I’ve done. Because I’ve raised awareness and maybe….just maybe I might have played a role in these boys having a fair chance. I sat back and reflected on what she said…and perhaps she is right. If my raising the awareness gets them treated better, gets them noticed and makes people realize that just because they aren’t “normal” doesn’t mean you give up on them….then it was worth every ounce of frustration, tears and stress. Chumani and Morgan have burrowed down into my soul. I love those little boys so much and I am so grateful to have had the opportunity to bond with them. I am so grateful to have had the opportunity to love them and be a brief part of their lives. I am a much richer person thanks to those two little angels.

I can’t even think about saying goodbye to them on Friday. I won’t think about saying goodbye to them on Friday. I am going to enjoy every second with them and worry about the goodbye when it gets here. I only see Morgan briefly now, when I pick up and drop of Chumani. When he is not in timeout, in his room…he seems genuinely happy to see me. :)

So…this is where I am right now. Thanks again to everyone for the interest and support.